Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups!
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If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?



half-mind.com
"Cool hash page"
December 2002

Jingle Bell Run Hash Trash

Dec 9, 2000 3:00PM

Hares: Flip-top Fag, F4

Another beautiful hashing day sunny and 20 degrees (I did say this was December in NY). The day started like any other hashing day, hares met at exit 15 to drive down to Ballston Spa. FTF decided he was hungry so before they left he decided to go to the local Taco Bell drive-thru. He pulls up to the window and surprised the cashier. He then has the where withal to ask if he was supposed to order somewhere else. The cashier points back at the order box, but low and behold it was too late, somebody else had already pulled up to order. Don't worry we won't pick on you too much for your STUPIDITY!!! Enough about that, the pack arrived in small doses with the first hounds being a visiting hasher from Utah Carpet Doesn't Match the Drapes and her friend No-name Paul. They were looking for a notorious character by the name of Dirtbag. Since I hadn't arrived yet they stayed in there vehicle keeping warm. When I arrived introductions were made and the rest of the pack arrived before the 3:00PM start time with the exception of one lost hound Pigvomit and poor No-name Heather. After the hares took off on trail the pack did a chalk talk for the newbies and visiting hasher. Once the chalk talk was done we did a rousing rendition of "Hi, my name is Joe". At this point the pack had reached the walk time and still no Pigvomit. Just as we were heading down the road Pigvomit pulled up and joined the rest of the pack. The first beer check the hounds consumed a pitcher of beer and a soda. $7. After a pretty screwed up rendition of the weekday song we left on our way to another bar. Again we purchased a pitcher of beer and a soda. $7. Here the pack did a rendition of Jingle Bells and again on the way to what would be the last beer check of the day. Pitcher of beer and a soda. $7. At least the pricing was consistent throughout the run. All the patrons at all the bars were quite amused by the antics of the HHH, of course they had never heard of such a thing. After the last beer check the pack headed up a rather long hill (at least most of the packs beer legs said so) the only one that didn't slow down before the top of the hill was our visiting hasher Carpet Doesn't Match the Drapes. She continued running through three more check points and to the finish. The pack was straggling behind mostly due to alcohol induced fatigue. McCavity brought up the rear for the DAL, his alibi was a sore back. I believe him only because he is usually way out front during any other run. Hope your feeling better for the next run. From the finish the pack carpooled to the down-down at No-name Don Martin's house. The bonfire was a welcome feature of the down-down. Couldn't get enough people close to the fire. A lot of moving around to get everybody a chance to get warm. The first down-down was to the hares, followed by down-downs by the newbies and visiting hashers. This is where we were shown why Carpet Doesn't Match the Drapes got her name. After the visual demonstration of top and bottom hairs not matching we applauded. The down-downs continued with the Hashit. Of course Pigvomit did his best to rid himself of the Hashit, nominating the GM for mismanaging free stuff give aways. He as a matter of course was nominated and the voted in as Hashit for being late and getting lost. When will he ever learn? He said he was going to add the Burlington Hashit to the HMHHH hashit, but it was quickly noted that we had a visiting hasher that could let the Burlington Hashit do some cross country traveling. With that CDMD quickly agreed to take the hashit with the plan of returning it to us if there wasn't a visiting hasher at the Salt Lake City Hash within the next month that would be willing to continue the travels of the BHHH hashit. With the deal done, everybody in presence at the event signed the BHHH hashit and a pic was taken with CDMD being framed by said hashit. Sorry BHHH should have been here to claim ownership. Maybe someday the hashit will return. Pictures will be posted of its travels. After all awards were made, much beer and a bottle of wine were consumed the crowd became more rambunctious. There was even an attempt at renaming the GM. That was quickly squelched and the party continued until previous engagements made the pack disperse. All in all the run turned out better than anticipated due to visiting hashers and a well laid trail by the hares, until the 23rd, On-On and:

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Dirtbag

GM, and stand in scribe HMHHH


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