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"Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted."



half-mind.com
"Cool hash page"
December 2002

LAST NIGHT


Last night I stayed at home and masturbated
It felt so grand! I used my hand.
Last night I stayed at home and masturbated
It felt so neat! I used my feet.
Beat it, stroke it,
Slam it on the floor.
Wrap it 'round the bedpost
Twenty times or more! (fine)

Last night I stayed at home and masturbated
It felt so nice, I did it twice.
Last night I stayed at home and masturbated
I'm such a man -- I come by hand!
Some people think that fornication is so grand
But I would rather stay at home
And do the job by hand!

Last night, I laid in bed and held my plonker
In my hand! And it was grand
Last night, I laid in bed and masturbated
It did me good! I knew it would

First, I did the long strokes
Up and down
Up and down
Then, I did the short strokes
I tickled the crown
I tickled the crown

And then I eased it, squeezed it
Whacked it on the floor
Yanked it, spanked it
Chucked it out the door

Some people tell me sexual intercourse is grand
But speaking for myself
I'd rather hold it in my hand

Halve Mein Hash House Harriers, Established 2000. All Rights Reserved. @@